Ingredients for a healthy, happy, & satisfying life
Self-Acceptance
Healthy people practice accepting themselves unconditionally, rather than rating themselves. They accept their attributes, positive or negative, and this doesnt waiver even on the bad days. They don't try to prove themselves to anyone.
Risk-Taking
Healthy people choose to take risks, even when they have some fears, because they want to pursue whatever it is they desire to do in life. They know life is an adventure, and risk-taking leads to achievement, satisfaction, and personal development.
Non-Utopian
Healthy people recognize that we don't get everything we want, and we don't avoid everything we would rather avoid in life. Life doesn't work that way, so we don't waste energy demanding the unattainable.
High Frustration-Tolerance
Healthy people understand that there are two kinds of problems in life: those they can do something about, and those they can't do something about. when they can do something about it, they choose to make changes that can lead to enhancing their lives. and when nothing can be done they don't dwell on it.
Self-Responsibility for Disturbance
Healthy people take radical responsibility for their wellbeing and lives. They do not blame their thoughts, feelings, or behaviors on other people, their parents, the world, and so forth. They do not have a victim mindset.
Self-Interest
Emotionally healthy people will sacrifice themselves somewhat for those they care and love; however, they will continue to put their self-interests somewhat above those of others. They understand that if they don't prioritize themselves that no one else will do it for them.
Social Interest
Most people choose to live in social groups, and in order to do so comfortably and happily, they would be wise to act morally, protect the rights of others, and aid in the survival of the society in which we live.
Self-Direction
We would do well to cooperate with others, but it would be better for us to assume primary responsibility for our own lives rather to demand nurturance from others.
Tolerance
It is helpful to allow oneself and others the right to be wrong. it is inappropriate to like obnoxious behavior, but it is not necessary to damn oneself or others for acting badly. Part of being human is making mistakes.
Flexibility
Healthy individuals tend to be flexible thinkers-- as opposed to having rigid, all or nothing thinking, and invariant rules. Rigidity leads to unhappiness.
Acceptance of Uncertainty
We live in a world of probability and chance; absolute certainties probably don't exist. The healthy individual understands that there is no guarantee of anything in life.
Commitment
Most people tend to be happier when vitally absorbed in something bigger than themselves. Pursuing creative interests, learning, and human involvement provide structure for a happy daily existence.
With Love,
Lindsay
Adapted from the REBT Practioners Handbook